It’s been five long years now since the Rolling Stones left me holding the bag in Bangkok and I haven’t heard a word of apology from them. Keith’s got magnums of time to make pirate movies, and I see that Mick is lately dragging his granddaughter around other people’s shows in London, which makes for some pretty horrifying pictures in the press.

The above “souvenir” card was one of thousands distributed in Bangkok ahead of what would have been the band’s first concert in Thailand, on April 10, 2003 (even though the card says April 8 — an early slip-up forecasting trouble).

History has lumped that show’s cancellation in with a string of others and tagged it with the SARS excuse — the sub-pandemic of November 2002 to July 2003 that killed 774 people, mostly in Hong Kong. That was indeed the reason given for the Stones making a detour around Hong Kong, Shanghai and Beijing, but that’s not why they backed off Bangkok.

Officially, at least — who knows what might actually have happened? — the band had roared across Australia and played Tokyo, Yokohama, Osaka, Singapore, Bangalore and Mumbai and were ready for Thailand next when their roadies’ airplane was grounded in Mumbai on April 9 “due to a technical problem”. No sound, lighting or stage crew could get airborne.

And that is supposedly why 11,000 people holding tickets to get them into Impact Arena in Muang Thong Thai in Bangkok’s north end didn’t get licked by the Rolling Stones on their “Licks” world tour.

The tour, which began in Boston on September 3, 2002, carried on to Europe, and in the midst of it, ironically enough, the Stones flew all the way to Toronto to play “SARSstock” on July 30, 2003, a benefit concert designed to help their “favourite city” get its tourism back in gear after the respiratory disease jumped on it thanks to sick tourists from Hong Kong.

So a half-million Torontonians got to see the band, and then, in the bigger irony by far, the Stones finished up in Europe and put on two “makeup” shows in Hong Kong in November 2003! Shanghai, Beijing and Bangkok didn’t get a second chance.

I’m not sure how much the Stones earned from the Licks tour, but the 2005-06 “Bigger Bang” outing pulled in something like $437 million, the best-earning music tour in history.

Somebody on eBay is selling the same Bangkok Stones card that I have for $6.99. I might be willing to go for less.

I did see the Stones a couple of times previously, however. How does that song go — “Maybe the last time, I don’t know!”